Short Circuit

Every night at 9 pm my mom calls me to let me know that she’s OK. I asked her to do this because I was worried about her being alone all the time. So the phone rings at 9 and knowing it’s her, I usually listen to the answering machine message, determine she’s OK, and go on with what I’m doing.

Why do I do this? Why don’t I just talk to her every night?

Because I hate talking for long periods on the telephone. My mom just doesn’t know when to stop talking. I realize she’s probably lonesome, but she goes on and on about her health down to the most minute detail and it drives me crazy. I do listen sympathetically for the first 5 minutes or so, and then some kind of overload switch gets flipped in me. She would keep me on the phone for an hour if she could.

I guess because I have health problems of my own, I get annoyed hearing about the health issues over and over. I feel some guilt about this, but I can’t help it. I want to keep a positive attitude and while I’m happy to commiserate with someone occasionally, I just can’t hang in as a regular, constant event. I don’t like to talk about my health challenges to others – I feel it’s a boring topic. I only wish the same courtesy was extended to me.

So what I do is take what she is saying and offer a positive spin on whatever the problem is. Then she says “sometimes it’s good to just complain and have someone listen without offering solutions”. I disagree, I don’t believe in complaining at length.

What’s a gal to do? The end result is that I pick up the phone about 3 days a week and try to listen to her “physical report card”. I consider that a compromise. I love my mom and I know she won’t be around forever.

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4 Comments

Filed under Life, Musings

4 responses to “Short Circuit

  1. Les

    Thats a good system you have with the answer phone. I know what you mean I know someone who unloads about their health. I told him the other day that when someone says to you “How are you” just say fine. Don’t go into graphic detail it only make people try to avoid you.

  2. We need to get our parents together, then they can complain to one another 🙂 about their various ailments.

  3. branwynne77

    I know what you mean. I really don’t want to hear about my dad’s bladder problems.

    Barf.

  4. I don’t talk to much on the phone and that is weird because in JH and HS, I couldn’t get off the phone. It is nice of you to check on your mom nightly though.

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